It
was my marriage anniversary. My 10th year anniversary and Neeraj had
thrown a grand bash to celebrate this happy occasion. Oh, what a pretty picture
we painted, my loving husband, my children-a 9 year old daughter and a 4 year
old son and I. Many of our guests exclaimed what a beautiful home I had and
what a lovely family we made. My parents who came down to celebrate this happy
day with us, took pride in showing off their son in law, a top businessman, who
looked after their darling daughter like a princess.
My
father told me that my husband was the best thing that had happened in my life.
And that I should do everything possible to keep him happy. My mother did not
look up. She couldn’t meet my eyes. Because she knew.
The
party ended quite late in the night and I was completely exhausted greeting the
guests and taking care of the arrangements. Slowly, the guests trickled out and
it was time to put the kids to bed. I hugged them close and slept beside them
until I could hear their soft snores. I wished that I could sleep beside them
but I knew better.
With
my heart pounding I went inside our bedroom. I saw Neeraj’s profile in the
dark, sleeping quietly under the sheets and I sighed as I realized he was
asleep. I crept soundlessly and slept at the edge of the bed. I could feel
Neeraj stirring and his arms fell on my waist.
“Neeraj,
I am very tired today”, I tried begging with him but I knew that no amount of
pleading would placate the monster in him.
“Oh,
come on, you don’t have to go to office in the morning. All you do is stay at
home and relax”, he said as he thrust himself on me. He pinned me to the bed
and as the silent tears slid down my cheeks, his grunts grew louder. I waited
for the torment to be over and lay as still as a dead body. But Neeraj did not
notice, in fact he never did. As the monster in him grew stronger, the bruises
appeared on my body.
I
remembered my kids and as I shut my eyes, their innocent faces appeared in my
mind. I remembered my mother, to whom I had gone to when I wanted to confide about
the abuse.
She
had turned me back saying that it was a wife’s duty to satisfy her husband’s
needs in bed. She had also said that Neeraj took good care of me and saw to it
that I was provided for. That was the
day I knew I was alone in this battle. If my parents wouldn’t support me who
would? Who could I talk to about what happens in my bed, in the dark of the
night?
I
had thought several times of escaping but each time Neeraj threatened to take
away my children. I knew he could do that. He had money, he had power. And who
would believe me if I said that my husband raped me every night, in the comfort
of my home. Some would even point out, it was my fault that I wasn’t able to
satisfy the carnal needs of my husband.
As
Neeraj finally rolled off me and went to sleep, I dragged myself to clean my bruises
and cover it up. After all tomorrow would be another day to keep up the façade and
present myself as the dutiful wife of the loving husband.
*I would have put a disclaimer saying this is a work of fiction but I cannot as this is a true story occurring in countless homes*
This was saddening to read :( How I wish people would draw the line somewhere. Her pain is palpable, Prasanna.
ReplyDeleteThis cannot be fiction. This is a true story in so many houses that I know off. Its really sad that people cannot believe that a rape can happen within a marriage. They just feel sex is necessary in a marriage. With or without consent.
ReplyDeleteSad world we live in.
So very true ! very few women will dare to share a story like this, but it does happens and its sad, women are taught to not only satisfy but also to believe that its normal for the husband to behave this way. I knew a women who went through life dreading every night, but she wants to continue because of her daughters ... thanks for sharing , its a sensitive post !
ReplyDeletethat was really horrifying!! stand up for herself or see d face of her children n take it all!! hw cud her mother jst nt help her!!!
ReplyDeleteI feel so bad...but this also happens sadly! You have written it so well that I could feel each emotion
ReplyDeleteR for Ready-Random Thoughts Naba
Oh no.... i was so sad already and the post almost made me cry.... you narrate so well!
ReplyDelete~S(t)ri
Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
Smile, it makes (y)our day!
Oh - Prasanna - I feel sick and sad and angry... You portrait her so well. How awful that it happens, and that her mother even can not know how to help her. And in your home, which should be the safest place right? Argh!
ReplyDeleteexcellently written ... there are so many women who are treated exactly like this every day. How dare her mother not help her.
ReplyDeleteI know your pain and empathize. Very well done and my hat is off to you. I respect you.
ReplyDeleteCarol @ Battered Hope
Very well written... I actually thought it was real!
ReplyDeleteSad story brilliantly narrated... Men turn beasts at night in many households...
ReplyDeletemakes me so sad..the atrocities lashed on a women, simply because of her gender.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the fine print you have put at the bottom of the post. This does indeed happen in so many homes and it is sadly hushed up under the carpet.
ReplyDeleteSo sad ! When your life partner turns abuser
ReplyDeleteit's horrifying and disgusting... what not a woman has to endure. Brilliantly written
ReplyDelete